Just Another Judgement Day n-9 Read online

  His brother was missing, presumed dead. Because of me.

  And these were the new Authorities—my old Enemies. Did that mean something? Had I escaped one awful destiny, only to see the start of another? Or had I really escaped anything at all? Julien Advent excused himself from the increasingly bad-tempered discussions and came over to join me. Walker made a point of moving politely away, while Suzie made a point of standing firmly at my side, glaring at everyone impartially.

  “Good to see you again, John,” Julien said easily. “I know we’re going to achieve great things together.”

  Suzie sniffed loudly. We both ignored her.

  “You always were the optimist,” I said. “I thought you didn’t approve of me?”

  “Mostly I don’t,” said Julien, with his usual frankness. “But on the whole you do more good than harm, in your own disconcerting and quite appalling way.”

  “That’s right,” I said. “Smooth-talk me.”

  Julien regarded me seriously. “We need you, John. No-one else can do what needs doing.”

  He broke off as Jessica Sorrow drifted over to join us, still hugging her teddy bear to her. Even the great Julien Advent got nervous around the Unbeliever. I sensed as much as saw Suzie reaching for her shotgun and shook my head urgently. Jessica stopped right in front of me and fixed me with her dark, bottomless gaze. She was so skinny there was hardly anything of her; in fact, her leather jacket probably weighed more than she did. She smiled briefly, almost shyly, and when she finally spoke, her voice was like a whisper from another room.

  “You helped me, John. Or at least, the bear did. I’m so much more together, these days.”

  “I’m glad to hear that,” I said.

  She looked me over slowly, consideringly. “Something bad happened. Something so bad I had to make myself forget everything, just to be rid of it. I don’t even know if my name really is Jessica. I’m better now. More . . . focussed. Being here, being a part of this, helps.”

  “We’re all very pleased to have you here with us, Jessica,” said Julien. And being him, he probably meant it. I had to wonder how the others felt, having the Unbeliever in their midst. Must be like sitting down with an unexploded bomb and wondering if you could hear ticking. I left Julien and Jessica talking and moved over to the long table. They’d run out of things to argue about, for the moment, and were scowling coldly at each other. Until I arrived, then they all switched immediately to glaring at me. I gave them my best cheerful smile.

  “Hi, guys. Where’s the buffet?”

  “We should never have invited you here,” said Larry Oblivion, his voice remarkably normal for a dead man. He scowled past me at Jessica Sorrow. “We should never have invited her, either. I don’t trust her.”

  “Hell, darling, I don’t trust anybody here,” said Annie Abattoir. If a cat could purr with a mouthful of cream while screwing another cat, it would sound like Annie. “But if I can put aside my prejudices, and my quite-justified paranoia where some of you are concerned, to try and make this work, so can you. Oh hush, dead man. We’ve heard it all before. Don’t make me come over there and sit on you.”

  “We all bring something to the table,” Julien Advent said firmly, as he and Jessica seated themselves again. “I bring respectability, and the power of the press. Jessica is here to frighten our enemies. Annie has practised her appalling profession for every side there is, and a few she made up specially, and so has important contacts everywhere. Count Video and King of Skin are both Major Players, and command respect. And Larry has built quite a reputation for public service, since his death.”

  “Nothing like dying to provide a real wake-up call to the conscience,” said Larry. “Heaven and Hell seem so much closer . . .”

  “If you wanted a professional private investigator, why didn’t you ask me?” I said, a bit put out.

  “You’ve never been much of a team player, John,” Julien said kindly. “And to be honest, given your . . . family history, no-one in the Nightside is ever going to feel comfortable with you in charge.”

  “He has a point,” said Suzie, leaning back lazily against the wall with her arms folded. “I’ll still shoot them all, though, if you like.”

  “Maybe later,” I said. I can never tell when she’s joking about things like that. Maybe she can’t either. I indicated Walker, still standing politely off to one side. “What about him? Why isn’t he a part of the new Authorities? He’s got more experience in running the Nightside than all of you put together.”

  “They asked me,” Walker said calmly. “I declined. My feelings about the Nightside are no secret, and I have to admit; my recent attempts at imposing some kind of order on the various Beings of the Street of the Gods...didn’t work out too well. I was called in to organise, regulate, and modernise all the various churches, religions, and Beings, but despite my best efforts, things . . . deteriorated quite rapidly. It’s not my fault the make-overs didn’t take. Worshippers can be so literal, and very stubborn. And then the Punk God of the Straight Razor got involved, and it all went to Hell in a hurry.”

  “I remember that,” I said. “For a while you couldn’t move in some parts of the Nightside for Beings running out of the Street of the Gods, crying their eyes out.”

  “Well, quite,” said Walker. “Either way, I feel I can best serve the interests of the Nightside as a functionary, not a decision-maker.” He smiled briefly. “Unless the new Authorities should prove unworthy or incompetent, in which case I will move in to shut them down.”

  “You would, too, wouldn’t you?” I said. “Suddenly and violently and with malice for all.”

  “It’s what I do best,” said Walker. “I have always found the possibility of sudden death tends to concentrate the mind wonderfully.”

  The new Authorities gave every indication of being united for the first time, as they glared at Walker.

  “Let’s get down to business,” I said. “You brought me here because of the Walking Man. Why don’t you people want him here? Would it really be so bad if he were to wipe out some of our more prominent scumbags and generally take out the trash?”

  “This Walking Man tends to favour the scorched earth policy,” murmured Walker. “And bad as this place undoubtedly is... there are some things here worth preserving.”

  I smiled. “You are mellowing, Walker.”

  “Told you,” said Walker. “Terrible, isn’t it?”

  “What exactly do we know for sure, about the Walking Man?” I said, looking round the table.

  Julien Advent took the lead, as always. “Throughout history, there has always been the legend of the Walking Man. That once in every generation, a man can make a deal with God to become more than a man. He can swear his life to God, and if that man will swear to serve the Light and the Good with all his heart and all his will, forsaking all other paths, such as love or family or personal needs...then that man will become stronger, faster, and more terrible than any other man. He will be invulnerable to all harm, as long as his faith remains true and he walks in Heaven’s path. God’s will in the world, God’s warrior, the wrath of God in the world of men, sent forth to punish the guilty and stamp out evil wherever he finds it. Called the Walking Man because he will walk in straight lines to get where he has to go, and do what he has to do, and no-one will be able to stop him or turn him aside.”

  “Some Walking Men have killed kings,” said Walker. “Some have overturned countries and changed the fate of the world. Others have followed more personal paths, clearing the world of evil one death at a time. Some stick to the shadows, some lead armies; and now one has come to the Nightside.”

  “If some of them have been so important, why don’t I know their names?” I said.

  “You probably do, if you think about it,” said Julien.

  “Ah,” I said. “Like that, is it?”

  “Mostly,” said Julien. “There have never been that many, down the centuries. Perhaps because no normal man would take such a deal, giving up love
and friends and everything that makes life worth living.”

  “They’re killers,” said Larry. “Cold-blooded, cold-hearted killers. Judge and jury and executioner. No mercy, no compassion, no pity.”

  “And only he gets to decide what’s evil and what isn’t,” said Count Video. “He doesn’t care what the law has to say. He doesn’t have to. He answers to a higher power.”

  “No shades of grey for the Walking Man,” said Annie. “Only stark black and white, all the way. You can see why so many people in the Nightside might be feeling a tad nervous, now that he’s here.”

  “So as far as he’s concerned, just by being here we’re all guilty,” I said. “I can see why you thought you needed me.” I considered the matter for a while. “What do we know about the current Walking Man?”

  “Nothing,” said Larry Oblivion. “Not even his real name. He’s invulnerable to all forms of remote viewing. We’ve tried science and sorcery, seers and oracles, and computers, gone cap in hand begging answers from important personages on all sides, and no-one knows anything. No-one wants to know anything. They’re all afraid of being . . . noticed. All we know for sure is that he’s on his way here. Hell, he could be here right now, walking our streets, and we wouldn’t know it till the bodies started piling up.”

  “He punishes the guilty,” Jessica Sorrow said quietly. “And so many here are guilty of something.”

  “But . . . if no-one can see him, what makes you so sure he’s coming?” I said.

  “Because he told us,” said Annie.

  “Sent me a very nice handwritten letter,” said Julien. “In my capacity as editor of the Night Times. Advising us of his purpose and intentions, and that he would be here within twenty-four hours. Which time is almost up. He wanted me to publish his letter, so everyone would know he was on his way and could put their affairs in order before he got here. Very considerate of him, I thought.”

  “Yes,” I said. “You would. Are you going to publish his letter?”

  “Of course!” said Julien. “It’s news! But... not just yet. We don’t need a panic. Or people taking advantage of the situation to settle old scores. We’re hoping you can . . . do something, before matters get out of hand.”

  I looked around the table. “What, exactly, do you want me to do?”

  “I would have thought it was obvious,” said Julien. “We want you to find the Walking Man and stop him from bringing death and destruction to the Nightside in general, and us in particular. He was quite clear in his letter that he intends to kill the new Authorities to send a message to the rest of the Nightside.”

  “How am I supposed to stop the wrath of God?” I said. Not unreasonably, I felt.

  Larry Oblivion smiled. “That’s your gift. We’re confident you’ll . . . find a way.”

  I suppose I asked for that. “What’s the fee?” I said.

  “One million pounds,” said Julien. “And...we’ll owe you.”

  I nodded. “Sounds about right.” I looked from face to face. “You’re all powerful people. And you know even more powerful people. Some of them so powerful they aren’t people at all. So why put your faith in me?”

  “Walker recommended you,” said Julien. “And you do have a reputation for winning out against impossible odds.”

  “You of all people should know better than to believe everything you read in the papers,” I said. I sighed, heavily. “All right. But let us be very clear about this. What exactly do you mean, when you say you want me to stop him? Do you mean reason with him, overpower him, or kill him?”

  “You are authorised to use any and all means necessary,” Julien said carefully.

  “Hell, you can try bribing him if you think it’ll do any good,” said Annie. “Do whatever it takes, we’ll clean up the mess afterwards. If you’ve tried being reasonable, and he doesn’t want to know, feel free to stick a gun up his nostrils and blow his bloody head off.”

  “Love to,” said Suzie, and we all looked at her.

  “I’m still worried about the whole unstoppable, invulnerable, wrath of God bit,” I said.

  “This from a man who’s fought angels from Above and Below,” said Larry. “At least, according to him.”

  “I know my limits,” I said, matching him stare for stare. “I can find the Walking Man. I can talk to him. I can use all kinds of tricks to confuse and divert him . . . but after that, your guess is as good as mine. We’re in unknown territory here.”

  “Scared?” said Count Video.

  “Bloody right I’m scared!” I said. “When the angels came here to fight their war over the Unholy Grail, their powers were strictly limited by the nature of the Nightside, and they still killed thousands of people and wrecked the place! And now Walker tells me the Nightside’s nature has changed, and we don’t even have that protection any more. If I had any sense, I’d go home and hide under the bed until this is all over. As it is . . . Look, when we talk about the wrath of God, we should be bearing in mind what happened to Sodom and Gomorrah, two cities destroyed by God for the sinfulness of their inhabitants. And I’ll bet good money they weren’t up to half the stuff that happens here on a regular basis, half price at weekends.”

  “He’s still just a man,” said King of Skin. His voice was deep and rich and irredeemably sleazy. “Every man has his weaknesses.”

  “I’ll be sure to mention that to him,” I said. “From a safe distance. Come on, I’m good, people, but even I can’t go up against the direct will of God. Just saying that out loud is enough to make me nervous of a plague of boils on my nether regions.”

  “You do have a Biblical background,” Julien said carefully. “Your mother was Lilith, first wife to Adam.”

  “Yeah, right—the one who rebelled against God’s authority, got kicked out of Eden, went down to Hell and slept with demons, and gave birth to monsters,” I said. “Really don’t plan on mentioning that connection to the Walking Man, thanks all the same.”

  “It’s only a parable anyway,” said Suzie, unexpectedly. “A simple way to comprehend a much more complex reality.”

  We all looked at her for a moment. Suzie can always surprise you.

  “Jessica Sorrow,” I said. “The Unbeliever...It seems to me that you’re the only one here with a strength of belief, or rather unbelief, to match the Walking Man. Maybe if we put the two of you together, you’d . . . equal out.”

  “That was then,” said Jessica, fixing me with her deep, dark, unblinking eyes. “I’m much better now.”

  There was a certain amount of uncomfortable shifting about in the room, as everyone disagreed vehemently without actually saying anything.

  “We’re saving Jessica as our last resort,” said Julien. “Our most dangerous weapon.”

  “Damn,” said Suzie. “I thought that was me.”

  Julien flashed her a sympathetic smile, then gave me his best grave and concerned look. “It has to be you, John. You’re the only one we can trust to do this.”

  “You keep saying that,” I said. “I’m still not convinced.”

  “I still don’t get this,” Suzie said stubbornly. “I mean, God’s wrath, fast and strong, yes, get all that. But what does he actually do?”

  “Anything he wants,” said Walker. “He’s as strong as he needs to be, and as fast. He can kill with any weapon, or with his bare hands. No door can keep him out, no argument can turn him aside, and nothing in science or magic can protect you from him.”

  “Yeah,” said Suzie. “But is he bullet-proof?”

  “As long as he walks in Heaven’s path, nothing in this world can touch him,” said Julien.

  “Even blessed or cursed bullets, with crosses carved in the end?” said Suzie.

  “He wouldn’t even blink,” said Walker.

  Suzie smiled suddenly. “Then I guess I’ll have to try harder.”

  “I’ve just had a cunning and downright disturbing thought,” I said. “If the nature of the Nightside has changed, could we perhaps contact the Opposition,
and have them send one of their agents to take on the Walking Man?”

  “Let’s you and him fight,” said Count Video. “I like it.”

  “Are you crazy?” said Julien. “Two Walking Men, going head to head in the Nightside? Remember how much damage the angels did? We’re still rebuilding!”

  “Well, what about the Street of the Gods?” I said, doggedly. “Isn’t there any Being there who feels strong enough to—”

  “Not one,” said Walker. “The whole Street is discussing moving itself out of phase with the Nightside, until this is all over, and it’s safe for them to return.”

  “There’s always Razor Eddie,” said Suzie.

  There was another silent uncomfortable moment, as everyone considered the implications of that.

  “The Punk God of the Straight Razor has always been a very just man, in his own appalling way,” I said finally. “He might decide to go along with the Walking Man. Eddie’s always practised a zero-tolerance policy where the really bad guys are concerned. In a strictly hands-on, blood and brains all over the walls, sort of way.”

  “I still say we should defend ourselves!” King of Skin said abruptly. “Each of us is a Power, in our own right. We need to show the Nightside that we are a force to be reckoned with! We don’t need to hide behind the likes of John Taylor. We should go abroad now, in all our awful glory, and grind this Walking Man beneath our feet!”

  “No!” Julien Advent said firmly. “This is no time to be proud! We can’t stop him. Not alone, or all together. He is the wrath of God in the world of men. There is no greater Power upon the Earth today! Our only hope is that John can out-think or out-manoeuvre him.”

  “We’re doomed . . .” said Count Video.

  “Hold everything,” I said. “Are we missing the obvious here? Why not send Walker? He can use his Voice on the Walking Man and command him to leave the Nightside and never come back.”

  “Wouldn’t work,” said Walker. “My Voice derives its authority from that original Voice, that said Let there be light. I doubt it would have any effect on one who is a lot closer to the source of that Voice than I will ever be.”